Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Who Shot That Albatross?

Final and absolute proof that I am cursed. I hold out on a job a friends offering me whilst another company (good interview) makes the decision to stick with contract people rather than go with permanent, the friend having to offer the job to someone else because he can’t wait. Not only can I not get the job that I’ve been doing for the last year in the local council (which I’ve just finished running the office by myself for a week in). But I get turned down by one of the local schools for a DBA job (too expensive, I think). Then a local college has my CV (read resume for USA). The manager, who wants to take the interviews personally, has fallen over and broken his hip, so is off work, and can’t take the interviews. In the meantime I am running out of time here because they will eventually present me with the person who did “interview well” and expect me to train them in the job.

Rope, gun, sharp knife, razor blade anyone?

To be honest if I shot myself I’d miss. If I tried to hang myself the rope would break, or be too long. The razor or the knife would be blunt. I’d crucify myself if it wasn’t for the problem of the last nail (note to self “must copyright the idea for self nailing crucifix”). I’d throw myself from a tall building but would probably bounce, or worse just break my spine and live on as a paraplegic (nothing against paraplegics, but given the choice I would rather not be one, I know most paraplegics aren’t given the choice, or would have loved the choice if one had existed at the time of the accident, I’ll shut up now I think!). I’d throw myself in front of a bus or train but they’d probably swerve and miss.

Picture a brilliant, bright, sunny day over Portsmouth with one tiny rain cloud, me underneath. Picture darkness following my every step. Picture accidents occurring around me, servers fail, airplanes fall out of the sky, just never on me.
Believe it or not the logon to the blogger server failed half way through me trying to post this, my PC locked me out and I had to re-start everything again. So sod Damian and that 666 rubbish, the day of the meekon5 is at hand. Da da da daaaaa!
I may as well go and eat worms!
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6 Comments:

Blogger ill man said...

I've just laughed for the first time in a week. I see in yr links you have someone with a blog called 'A Curate's Egg'. I have just changed my blog to 'The Curate's Egg'. Seperated by an increment of semantics. Oh well.....law suits have been for less...........=D

09 June, 2006 23:51  
Anonymous Lynn said...

This is all about your energy don't you think? I like to think that things like this are just a phase and it "wasn't meant to be."

12 June, 2006 13:35  
Blogger meekon5 said...

I removed the pins from the eyes of my Voo Doo doll last night. Did a cleansing ceremony. All on the almost throw away comment from a mate of mine who said “You’re not doing any of that Voo Doo stuff again? Are you? You know how badly it messed things up last time!”
Please don't get me wrong. I think I'm using this blog as therapy, it lets me vent my frustrations. I'm not actually a suicidal manic depressive loony about to top myself. I just write like I am.
To be completely honest the worst that could happen is I sell the house and move into something smaller, which I can better afford.

12 June, 2006 14:09  
Blogger littlebitofsonshine said...

way cool

14 June, 2006 00:55  
Blogger Lillie said...

At least you are able to take a crappy day (week? year?) and turn it into something that makes other people laugh out loud.
That's talent, bub, and a marvelous attitude too.

16 June, 2006 11:22  
Blogger meekon5 said...

Sometimes I think I rant too much and people really don't take a lot of what I say seriously. But there again we did have to explain to my godson (ten at the time) that it was “easy to tell when I’m taking the piss,
my lips move”.

16 June, 2006 12:18  

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